After what has seemed like years of deliberation, we have decided that Charles will become a stay at home dad, at least for the time being. He will join the ranks of Michael Douglas, and..., and...., surely there must be others?? After doing a bit of research I found that there are other stay at home dads and, apparently, they really hate being called Mr. Mom. There are web support groups like: www.rebeldad.com and stayathomedad.org
So far, all the people that I have told this news to have said, "Oooohh," in an alarmed tone, "does he realize how hard that will be???" So many people have said this that I have begun to doubt our decision. Then I think: wait a minute, aren't they referring to the same job that I have been doing for the past five months? Wouldn't I know how hard it would be? Or do these people have some secret knowledge they aren't sharing with me? Do people issue the same warnings to moms that are considering being stay at home moms? Or, are they concerned because Charles is a man, i.e., a MR. MOM!?! Poor Mr. Mom gets sucked into the cheesy drama of soap operas, is inept in every way, and nearly has an affair. Hopefully, Charles won't suffer the same fate, although he did manage to sit on my peanut butter toast this morning.
He assures me he won't have an identity crisis and I annoy him by giving way too many instructions on this or that baby thing. I have spent nearly every minute with Renee since she was born. I am going to have to adjust to letting go, letting someone else take the reins. I am glad it will be Charles because letting go is a bit more difficult than I imagined. I think she is very lucky to have a daddy like Charles and we are both very lucky to have baby Renee. Besides, they're only babies for a very short time. Before we know it, Renee will ask us not to kiss her when we drop her off for school, she'll want to dress herself and basically, have nothing to do with us, which will mean we've done our job. In the meantime, I think we'll ignore the naysayers and get on with doing things our way. To the Mr. Mom's around the globe: UNITE! to change the stereotype.
how can you resist?
4 comments:
That's awesome! What a big weight off of your shoulders.
Charles is going to be a great stay at home dad. I think the Oooohs are more for you than for him. Oooooh it's gonna hurt when he gets to spend all that time with her while you work. Just don't be jealous. Be grateful that since letting go has to happen, at least you get to let go to someone who loves her as much as you do and not some weird child minder. Good decision. I'm proud of you, since I know it was harder for you to give up that post than it was for Charles to step into it. Kiss Renee for me!
One more thing, will Charles be taking over the blog updates too? Just need to be clear on who we should be harassing for updates on Renee's latest movements.
Charles is the Daddy who agreed to be the primary parent even before he thought of being a parent. That makes him the best kind of Daddy a child could ever have. And it speaks to his desire to support you, his wife, as you attend to your goal of completing your PhD. He said he would always support your great effort and that he knows how important your goals are to you and how hard you have worked to achieve them. You worked equally hard to achieve Renee. If I could pick parents for myself, I would like to have you and Charles to be my mommy and daddy. You are both the best. XOXOXO - you are loved every second of every day.
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